A couple of memories...

Discussion in 'Past Life Memories' started by Eternal Light, Apr 15, 2010.

  1. Nightrain

    Nightrain Senior Registered

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    There are dreams; then, there are vivid dreams that seem real and often repeat, and could definitely be past life memories. There is no clear distinction between the two, and the choice is very subjective. The trouble with dreams of any kind, however, is that we often begin losing pertinent parts of the dream as soon as we wake, and try to fill the gaps with our own conscious knowledge of current events. Thus, it is the dreams that repeat themselves, which are often indicative of past life memories.


    In my own personal experience, dreams are mostly symbolic indicators of my present frame of mind and seem to have no relation to past lives. However, my wife has had dreams, which clearly relate to possible past lives and cause her to sit bolt upright in bed with a conscious and detailed memory of the dream. I call these glimpses, because they have no story line, but they evoke emotions that have no relation to whatever is happening in the present life.
     
  2. Eternal Light

    Eternal Light New Member

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    Firstly, let me apologise for not having posted in so long… I have been so caught up in other things, and have also been rather ill at one point. In any event, please accept my apologies.


    I don’t know why this memory is difficult for me to relate. It’s not as if it is traumatic in any way, and it is quite clear in my memory. There is no earthly reason for me not to put pen to paper, so to speak, about it. But, although it appears by all accounts to be a very benign memory, it has always caused me to feel ‘uneasy.’ Go figure…


    It starts with me riding in a coach of some sort. I can’t tell you what kind of coach it is because I am on the inside, looking out. As I look out of the coach window (don’t think there is any glass…), I am completely unmoved by the very pleasant vista of rolling hills and distant hamlets. It’s a rather long journey. I seem to be ‘empty-headed.


    In that, I mean that I don’t seem to be really interested in anything other than my fine frock, which I absent-mindedly stroke at invisible creases that I perceive in the frock; and some rather splendid Rubies at my throat. They hang down, and I am quite preoccupied with the clearness and ‘jello-like’ appearance of them. Their ‘beauty’ and color are, to me, quite fascinating. I have no clue as to what the interior of the coach looks like. I only know what the vista outside is like, and the color of the Rubies.


    I know that I am going to see my children. They don’t live with me. I don’t think anything of that in the memory; but the ‘me’ in this lifetime is appalled at my blasé attitude regarding such an odd state of affairs. I don’t ‘feel’ excited about seeing my children. I don’t feel that it is anything special. It is just ‘something I am doing today,’ ii seems to me now. I’m finding the journey tedious, and am just watching the countryside, and the ever changing scenery.


    I can’t see the coach driver, or the horse/s, and I never do, in the memory. I know he opens the door to the carriage, when we reach our destination, but I never actually look at him, in the memory. I’m appalled about this now…


    We’ve stopped at a cottage in a clearing in some woods. A lady stands smiling at the door to the cottage. She is wearing a frock of some sort of grey material that kind of looks green, in certain lights. She walks toward me, and the dress sort of ‘shimmers’ between a grey/green. Rather weird.


    She greets me, we greet each other really, but quite formally, and then I go into the house. She shows me to a certain room, where the doors are already open, and I see a lady standing by two small children, playing on the floor. There is a girl and a boy. The girl is slightly older than the boy, who is perhaps 4 or 5 years old, I think. I have no idea of the appearance of the woman stood beside them; absolutely none. I think I must have been a totally unfeeling robot, because I don’t have any memory of anything other than rigid formality, I am indifferent to the woman, actually. ://


    The last thing of that memory is of watching the little boy (who I know is my child, yet I have made no move towards the children whatsoever), as he plays with a bright red, wooden toy train.


    The memory has nothing about it that would cause me to feel extremely uneasy, but it has always made me feel so…


    Odd!
     
  3. Nightrain

    Nightrain Senior Registered

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    First of all, Eternal Light; making apologies is strictly verboten. :laugh:


    Actually, there is no rule that anyone must keep posting. However, we did miss you!


    The impression I got from your memory is that you may have been in England during the 19th Century. Hired help were treated as though they were invisible, and it would have been below your dignity and duty to acknowledge them in a friendly manner. It was a very regimented society, which attributed their success as an empire to being utterly cold, hard and distant. British soldiers were treated in much the same manner. If any officer behaved in a friendly manner toward his enlisted men, he would lose his commission and serve his time as one of them. The only reason I didn't think the time could have been earlier is because of your description of the hostess' dress.


    Your position in society must have been very high, and keeping the children elsewhere was characteristic of ladies in waiting for the Queen, or a consort to the King. Let me know if any of this resonates with your memory.
     
  4. Eternal Light

    Eternal Light New Member

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    Ok, got it! lol. Thanks.

    Thank you again. :)

    Actually, my Mother is English, and I’m there now. I live here for a good part of the year. I have a particular nostalgia for England 20’s,30’s and 40’s era’s. I believe at least one of my lifetimes, and possibly more were spent there/here.


    I’ve often wondered Nightrain, if in fact the memory of the ‘go-chair and buttoned garments were from this particular lifetime memory. Your impression of the time period of this particular memory stunned me (I had always thought of it as happening at a much earlier date).


    But, on reflection, I realized that I simply haven’t a clue when it could have occurred, and so your guess is entirely as good as mine, in fact, probably better. I get so demmed mad that I cannot get more from these memories. I don’t even get names, like most do, and I can only guess at my different ages in the memories. *sighs*

    Below my duty? A horrid custom!

    The ‘distant’ I can ‘feel’ in me, from that memory, and it appals me. I so hope that I was not ‘hard or cold,’ but I suspect that you are correct in your assessment. I cannot imagine anyone that I know, who is a Mother today, not stepping forward with a hug, after being absent from their child for some time. I actually feel a sense of shame. I don't have children, yet, in this life; but I know that I would not hesitate to rush to hug them, after not having seen them for so long.


    What is even more appalling is that I know without a doubt that it did not even occur to me then, to do so. I ‘feel’ that I loved my children, in my own way, but it was not a demonstrative thing. I was not a demonstrative person, and, even more scary, I am today, quite reserved in many ways and, undemonstrative to a degree, still. I have a great deal of difficulty in accepting hugs from anyone other than very close relationships. If a friend hugs me I tend to hold myself rather rigidly. This is at odds with my emotions, and certainly at odds when in a close relationship. I feel the emotion, I just can't act upon it in certain circumstances.


    This has to be, surely, the result of that lifetime? I also wonder… (I hate ostentation, large jewellery and loud people, amongst other things), and I suspect that this trait may stem from that lifetime also. The odd thing is that in this lifetime I am absolutely the quintessential, typical Libran that I was born. I am very complex, and certain traits fight to come to the fore. lol.

    I didn’t understand this reference of yours to my description of the dress worn by the hostess who greeted me. Could you elaborate please?

    I am so sorry; what I’ve related is what I essentially have. There is nothing more. I have had this and other memories for a lifetime. I have tried unsuccessfully to marry some of the memories together. I wish so badly that I had more to this and the other memories, but I don’t.


    I often feel like a fraud when I read about others who have similar memories and they, unlike me, even have names and places that they recall. Their detailed descriptions make me feel so inadequate. I had, and still have a similar dilemma when it comes to math. I simply can’t grasp it. It is intangible and unfathomable. I feel the same frustration to my past life memories as I do with math. ://


    I am out of town from this evening for a few days, a week or more, but I shall reply to any posts as soon as I return home. :)
     
  5. ChrisR

    ChrisR Administrator Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Hi Eternal Light :)

    It's not a competition to see who can remember the most detail from their past lives, and it certainly doesn't give you any higher 'status' if you can remember more than the next person. I think the level of detail in your memories is very impressive considering that many people don't consciously remember anything of their past lives, even when they try to.


    So I think your frustration over not remembering 'enough', might actually be hindering your progress. Just relax and be thankful for what you DO remember, and try not to focus on what you DON'T remember. I think however much we remember of our past lives, it never seems to be enough. For me personally, I always feel that just one more step will be enough for everything to become clear to me, but each question answered just opens up a hundred more questions :D
     
  6. Nightrain

    Nightrain Senior Registered

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    Your description of this dress immediately brought to mind a type of dress worn in the mid 1800's, which was made of iridescent green taffeta, and would reflect as a sort of shiny gray with certain light. This was the beginning of the Victorian Period when Queen Victoria was much younger. It's possible that she was also wearing crinoline, which would have made the skirt extra wide.
     
  7. Jadeswan

    Jadeswan New Member

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    This is so true for me too! Chris' whole post is so accurate and to the point and I think he has an especially good point that straining to remember can actually hinder the process.


    Eternal Light, it sounds to me like you have fairly detailed memories. You seem to remember a lot of emotions and I think those can be most significant in helping us learn from our past memories. Please don't compare yourself to others and feel "lacking" in some way. Every one of us has gaps in our memories and we could all compare our memories negatively to the memories of someone else on here. For example, you remember amazing details of the clothing in your memories whereas I'm lucky to remember the general shape and color I was wearing. We're all so different and so our memories will have different themes and strong points. I believe with time and patience we will each remember all we are meant to remember, all we need to remember.
     
  8. Eternal Light

    Eternal Light New Member

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    Thanks for the input everyone, since I last posted. I only got back from being out of town yesterday, and will reply as soon as I have gotten back into a routine here at home. :)
     
  9. Eternal Light

    Eternal Light New Member

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    I am astounded at your knowledge of materials used in past times; and rather excited to read about the grey/green dress, since this is some validation for me, regarding the memory. Thank you, Nightrain.I do have to say tho, that the dress she wore, the Hostess, was not a wide one at all, rather the opposite in fact. The frock, from what I remember was smooth, and hung in folds, and was quite ‘form fitting.’ Rather in the style shown in the picture, but not so ‘modish.’ It was simple, quiet and refined, but very similar in 'form style' to the one depicted below.
    Yes, you’ve definitely hit home with the ‘emotional memories.’ I think that that is the most singular phenomenon about them in my case. The physical senses that have ‘hung around’ long after the lifetimes have passed. Sometimes, the sense of smell from a memory is hauntingly nostalgic for me; even a ‘mustiness’ smell that I have, from a little used and over-exposed sunlit room, or a damp smell from a shed. I seem to have carried these over with me to the nth degree. Chris; I agree also, that I need to ‘step back’ a bit from trying so hard to remember. I’ve recently started some gentle meditational exercises, and I do this as much as possible outdoors, because that is where I feel that I am best relaxed. formal attire.jpg

    /monthly_2010_07/57c5f180ab6a4_formalattire.jpg.c6138c3babab1db25f492b5edf3c9696.jpg
     
  10. Overseas

    Overseas Senior Registered

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    Glad to hear you picked up meditation Eternal Light!


    To your interest, someone (I thought it was a moderator) put a link on the forum some months ago to a site on which you could see all sorts of clothing from previous centuries. I'm sure another forum member can refer to its right place here.


    As for your memories, I do think you are getting enough PL info :laugh: so don't be impatient (I don't even have half that much memories). I even have a feeling that this is evolving well with you and you'll see (in fact you know that already) that all is interwoven: the actual things you deal with and what happened in the past. It's my personal conviction that in time you'll be able to resolve it all and reach full balance!


    It is obvious that the woman in your last memory is of higher class. Often validation can be made in books, by photographs (both on the internet or via the real stuff) because the higher class took care of their life's registration. In this case it should be much easier to find an element which can connect you to the particular lady than if you were a poor woman so to say. There's much you can compare to and if you search long enough sooner or later you will find a point of recognition. The internet is, of course, a great means to that.
     
  11. Nightrain

    Nightrain Senior Registered

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    The photo is of a "turn-of-the-century" style before the First World War. That doesn't seem to fit the carriage you were riding in. There is another period when dresses were form fitting, which was very late 18th Century and early 19th Century; and it was known as the "Empire" period style.
     
  12. Eternal Light

    Eternal Light New Member

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    Yes, I realized it didn't fit in, it's all that I could find that comes close to how the dress looked; but that's not the only thing that concerns me about that memory either Nightrain. I don't think that the little wooden toy engine that my little boy in my memory was playing with, fits in either.


    As for the picture of the dress that I found, it isn't the style of dress, but it was the closest one that I could find that fits the description. The dress that the Hostess was wearing was not nearly as 'modish' as the one I found, but was kind of in that 'shape.' It was very simple, but well made. I would say even 'refined,' but very plain.


    The folds were not pleats, as in the picture, but it's the best that I could find as an example.


    I’ve looked at your link (thank you for that), and although once again the dresses are form fitting, they are cut too low for the dress that the Hostess was wearing. The dress she was wearing was not so low cut, and the waist was definitely not under the bosom.


    I have actually found something that looked incredibly like the dress she was wearing, but I figured I must be wrong because it was called an ‘overdress’ which I understand was rather like a coat dress? I don’t see how she would have been wearing something to go out in when she was at home awaiting a visitor. Namely, me. ://
     
  13. Nightrain

    Nightrain Senior Registered

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    Seeing it would still give an indication of a period style, even though the clothing use isn't exact. Could it have been something like this?[​IMG]
     
  14. Eternal Light

    Eternal Light New Member

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    Yes, that's very similar Nightrain. The neck, the long sleeves and the height of the waist are all reminiscent certainly, and it looks much more like the actual dress than the one that I was able to find.


    It wasn't the same material, obviously, and it didn't have the ruche at the hip, nor the prominent button down feature. But it's essentially a very good likeness.


    I was talking to my Mother about this very subject last night, and trying to get some input from her as to what I actually said when I was a child, about it. But naturally we were trying to cast our minds back 30 odd years and she simply couldn't remember details (she did bring up something else, of which I shall relate at a later stage here, if'n I haven't already done so somewhere else on PL... in fact she mentioned a couple of incidents that she termed 'as 'rather curious utterances' from me).


    But, aside from these remembrances, she said something that struck me as quite insightful. She said, "You know Laurie, you are searching too hard for something that cannot have been replicated, since dresses were all hand-made at the time, and no two dresses would have been the same." And, of course, I guess she was right.


    Nightrain, thank you for all of your assistance in helping me to get this somewhat correct. I really appreciate it. :)
     
  15. Sunniva

    Sunniva Administrator Emeritus

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    Very interesting memories, Eternal :) I enjoy reading along!

    I think this may be what you're referring to: Fashion Era


    There are more interesting sites recommended for research here :thumbsup:
     
  16. Eternal Light

    Eternal Light New Member

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    Sunniva, thank you for your kind words, and the links, Both of which are much appreciated. :)


    I’m about at the end of my conscious past life memories now, and so I will talk about some of the dream ‘memories’ I have had during my life. The only reason that I pick out these dreams is because they give me the exact same feeling of ‘actually being there,’ of actual ‘memories’ of ‘me.’ But the ‘me’ in the dreams is not living now. er… I know what I mean, I think. :confused:


    In any event the first one that I want to relate was a dream that I had as a child; I can’t recall now at around what age I was when I had the dream, but it was between the age of 10 to 12 years.


    In the dream I am sometimes ‘in’ the person of whom I feel that I am, and sometimes I am watching her, in the scene, from behind. So, first let me speak of the vision and feelings that I have when ‘in’ the form of the girl in the scene. I am at a Well. It is about just below waist high to me, and we have just dropped the pail down it. When I say ‘we’ I mean myself, and an elderly man who is stood opposite me. And I have such a feeling of deep, deep love and respect for him.


    He is about 60/65 years old, and he is dressed in some kind of garment, a bit like a smock I think. I’m not quite sure what the garment is really, partly I think because he has a long bushy beard that covers his chest. It is grey, the same as his hair, of which he has a lot of, but I don’t think it is too long. I am concentrating on what we are doing, and not taking too much notice of his appearance; sorry. He is stocky. Maybe around 5’7/8”


    But, the feeling, the emotion, is simply overwhelming. This man is like a God to me. He is my Father, or my Grandfather, and I love him so much. He teaches me things, he is my mentor. The emotions and feelings are so strong, I can feel the emotions of those moments in time, even now, as I write about it, and my eyes are almost welling up. This is a simple, but goodly life feeling for me, and I am at peace standing there, working alongside this man; more so than I can ever remember being since, from what memories I have; yet, I don’t mean to disparage my lot in life this time around. I have it good now too. But that lifetime was different because I am at peace with myself emotionally and spiritually. It’s hard to explain folks.


    I’m not too sure of what it is exactly that we are doing there, but I don’t think (I don’t know why), that we are fetching water. Even tho we have lowered the rope down the well, it feels that somehow we are doing something more, something different to just fetching water. Sorry, I just can’t get the intention there…


    As for me, well, when I am ‘watching’ the scene I see only my back view and not much of the man at all. I would have to guess my age to be around 13 maybe. I am not skinny, yet neither am I plump. I suppose the expression would be ‘slightly sturdy.’ I am wearing a long frock down to the ground, and although it isn’t padded, nor does it have hoops or anything like that, it has many tiny folds at the waist. It is full skirted in other words. The bodice is close fitting, what I can see of it because I have long, very long, curly, almost ash white hair. It does not appear to be contained in any way. The frock has three quarter sleeves, and has vertical stripes on bodice and gown. The stripes are subdued, and quite thin. They seem to be a very pale mauve/blue. I would guess my height to be around 5’


    Altho sturdy looking, I get an immense impression that I am kinda strong in one sense, yet fragile in another. It is the weirdest oxymoron. It is just an impression, and I can’t get clearer than that. Sorry guys…


    It is a bright sunny day, and I do not see any buildings, not that I was really looking, but I felt so much in that scene, I think I might have noticed a building. Despite the length of the post, the moment, the dream was always very short in content. That’s all there was visually, but the emotion felt in the dream could have taken up a lifetime to express. It was strong and deep.


    PS. I will post more of my 'dream memories' later. :)
     
  17. Nightrain

    Nightrain Senior Registered

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    It may be possible to get some insight, if you are able to describe the well. We often consider wells as just some utilitarian commonplace item on one's landscape that we don't realize would be indicative of the culture or local geology. Although there are a variety of styles, we most often assume that most wells are round structures built of stone with a crank spool and a roof. But, they can also be square, made of wood, totally enclosed, or just covered by a broad board. Did you get any first impressions of the type of well? Did you have the impression that you were fully grown? Did you have a shawl of any kind over your shoulders?
     
  18. Eternal Light

    Eternal Light New Member

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    No, the Well has no roof, and it is made of brick. The only one that I can find that comes close to it is the one that I’ve attached here. I think there is a board there, but I don’t think we use it; just an impression I had during the dream. If you can picture a very similar Well to this one, perhaps a bit lower in height, surrounded by a sort of sandy, gravelly ground, and in a rural area, then you’ve pretty much got what I see.


    I didn’t mention this in my first post, and indeed I never saw any such structure during that dream; yet I am certain that there was some sort of grey brick wall behind me. Whether it was just a free standing wall enclosing one side of the Well, or whether it was a wall to a dwelling I don’t know. This is just a strong impression that I have, I cannot swear to the wall being behind me.


    We would just push a pail over the side of the Well, on a long rope, but as I said before, I don’t think that we were there to actually fetch water. I get the impression that I just idly pushed the pail down in an absent-minded fashion. I think we were doing something else at the well, to the well, or, around the well. But also, I think that it was more of a ‘lesson’ that I was avidly attending to. I feel that this man, my Father, or Grandfather was my hero, my mentor, my conscience, my guide. And, I feel loved, very much so, and I love him back, and I get the impression that if he told me that the sky is actually sky-blue-pink with yellow dots, I would vainly try to see that also.


    I am not fully grown, in answer to your question. I am about 13 years old, and I am not wearing a shawl. I feel ‘precious.’ I am an only child in this lifetime, and I always felt/feel treasured, and that’s how I feel about that memory. I think I was treasured. I felt that this man was inordinately proud of me.


    Nightrain, I’ve never really talked much about this dream to anyone really; just a couple of people; yet, having opened up this much, here, it seems to me now that this was a regular stopping point, this Well, for intellectual discussion (despite my young age). Does that sound odd? It’s just how I feel about it now, having looked deep into the memory.
     
  19. Eternal Light

    Eternal Light New Member

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    Sorry, forgot the picture... Typical me. :eek:

    stone_well_lake_photo_taber_1950s.jpg

    /monthly_2010_07/stone_well_lake_photo_taber_1950s.jpg.d5d323e9018c96ff514d748085a76610.jpg
     
  20. Eevee

    Eevee Administrator/Archivist Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Hi Eternal Light,


    You said you were at the well for a different reason than for fetching water. When I was a kid, we had sort of a similar well at our house, only we didn't fetch water with a rope, but with a long wooden thin pole or a stick, with an iron hook attached on it. It was not easy to fetch water without the pail falling off the hook. I remember my father teaching me how to do it. :)


    We also had a similar well at the back of the house, but that water was not so clean, because it was close to the house, and some dirt from the roof might fall into it etc. This water we only used for cleaning or watering the garden and so on, not for cooking or drinking or washing ourselves. I also remember that my uncle, whose hobby was fishing, often came to fetch the top water of that well, because at a certain time of year there were a lot of mosquito larvae in it, which he used as bait.


    These are the possibilities I could name of what you were doing at the well. :)


    Eevee
     

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