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What/Who Do You Hate Because of PL(s)?

SeaAndSky

SeaAndSky

Senior Registered
I have heard over and over again about what people like, are drawn to, or are afraid of (lots of PTSD around here). However, no one ever talks about what they hate, hate, hate! (Or even just don't like very much because of PL experiences).

Hate is much more "unevolved" and un-spiritual than love. Fear is understandable, and gets a lot of compassion here, but hate is something we don't seem to want to acknowledge. However, just as our PLs sometimes give us pre-set feelings of fear or attraction related to certain things, I am just as certain that they create animosity as well. Is it normal, for example, to expect that someone who died in a concentration camp wouldn't "hate" Nazis? Are you still nursing a grudge against the Catholic Church because of something that happened during the Inquisition? Are you one of the many that suffered enslavement because of the Barbary pirates? Everybody has been stomped on by someone in the past--anger and animosity in these situations is no more unnatural than fear.

That's one side of the question. I'll leave the second part for later.

S&S
 
I think people can certainly carry fear and aversion from one life to the next. Fear and aversion are the roots of 'hate'. There was a person in the forum a while back who recalled having carried a fear and aversion to 'black' people from one PL to the next, but this life, they had very successfully overcome that.


I wouldn't like to think that I carry any old 'hates' with me. There are some bad things that happened, but, hey... that's life. I have certainly carried 'loves' with me from one life to the next though.
 
The idea of appendicitis


When as a kid I've first heard of the strange and mysterious "organ" the appendix I was fascinated and repulsed at the same time. They told us if we swallow seeds we might get an inflamed appendix and they would have to operate on it. Then 45 years later I found out that I, in a former life as AOSpare died of an burst and untreated appendix...


Then recently, I was watching the movie Physician, the picture revolved around the un-treatable nature of then called "side sickness", it brought back the same weird feelings.
 
I too have a bad feeling when I think of Nazi Germany. For some reason WWII history in class bored me a lot and I didn't have much interest in it. The Middle Ages/Dark Ages/Medieval Times bothered me a lot as well. I don't like to say hate, but it was a mixture of "get me out of here" and this history is depressing and boring to study.
 
There are some guys at my college I really dislike even though they haven't done something bad to me in this life. I just don't trust them, and I really hate the way they act.


Obie, I can totally relate to that. I've had some nightmares that could indicate a PL in WWII and when I was in pre-school I thought the subject was really boring and uninteresting. I didn't get much from it because it was like I already knew everything about it. I first saw movies about WWII during the school-projects.


I apologize for grammar mistakes because English isn't my first language.
 
I'm not sure how to separate the PTSD from the "hate" since I don't know for sure what the difference is. Fear-hate-trauma are all pretty similar in my mind.


For me, I hate:


- Being misunderstood (both positive and negative). I've finally learned to stop trying to force someone to understand me by over-explaining, and to let them "not know me" if they choose not to listen or attempt to understand. It still sends me into a rage all too often when it's someone important to me, who I really believed would want to understand where I'm coming from.


- Going under water rapidly or unexpectedly ... or for a long period of time. I get that panicky asthma-attack type feeling even when I'm comfortably swimming with my head above the water. After one attempt at diving long, long ago, I've avoided it my whole life, and no water skiing either.


Even the boys who used to tease the girls by dunking them quickly learned not to do that to me. There is a certain expression my face gets that seems to be pretty much a "command" to anyone who sees it. (I still think it would be nice to find someone I trust completely and see if I can work through this enough to dive someday.)


- Any type of pointy-thing. I still get nauseous when people start talking about the uses of stakes or spears (let's just say certain elements of history are completely off the table for conversation).


- Needles I had to face because I was often sick as a child, and now I just close my eyes and wait, though there was a time when I could hardly stand to be near them. Sewing also helped me realize they aren't a big deal, though there was a time when I wouldn't hold a needle if anyone was within arms reach because it felt like bad things would happen. Just don't mention that they can be used for destruction as well as healing and mending. Even typing that last sentence made me queasy. Heh!


- There was a time when cutting food with sharp knives was something I hated, especially if anyone was nearby. It took me a very long time to be comfortable in the kitchen. Oddly, I think I resolved that one with my memory of seppuku with my master.


- Also enclosed ovens are nasty and guaranteed to burn anyone who gets anywhere near them (I always use the ultimate protection when baking.) even though open flames don't feel even remotely dangerous and I can put my hand into the edge of a fire to pull a stick into place without feeling nervous.


- Steamy rooms are awful, ugh! I refuse to go in. But a natural hot-spring cave is okay so long as it isn't dark and super-enclosed.


- For some reason I dislike being too close to a waterwheel. (I love the sight of water flowing, though, so it's okay at a distance and feels more like a waterfall.) Basically, there's just this sense of what it's like to be trapped by a waterwheel somehow, crushed and drowned.


- I also hate not having wings... *sighs* LOL


I don't know if this fits in the category of what you're looking for,... hatred is such a strong term.... I really do try to face the present life impact of these things (obviously I avoid the idea of torture and many history topics as a result) instead of simply allowing the instinctive reaction to rule me for no reason.
 
Hi Mere,


In response to your question whether this is what I was looking for, the answer is no, but that's OK.


I was thinking that people would tell me they hated this or that because of some clear link to something in a PL. (I think you could probably do that with some of the things you just mentioned based on hints in your posts). One of the things that I hadn't anticipated was that people would immediately associate the various unexplained antipathies in their life with a possible PL issue. And, you know, they are probably right. An antipathy without a reason does beg for an explanation, and this one makes a fair amount of sense. It may be a clue to their PL history.


I was also interested in seeing whether the hates would get more "personal" and seeing whether the conversation would take a philosophical turn. I.e., on the one hand, if you have good reason to hate the SS, how does that impact the way you react to someone who was SS in a PL? Other examples: Should someone feel like its OK to hate Pol Pot, Hitler, Stalin, or Ted Bundy (and I know I'm mixing up mass murderers and serial killers here)? What about the person who used to be one of these? We recently had a young lady on the board who claims to have been SS and then Ted Bundy. What if we have someone who claims to have been Hitler? Does their present affirming or disaffirming attitude towards the PL matter?


Can we ultimately hate anyone in this situation, or can we merely hate the things they stand for? Even with the villains of yesteryear, don't we have to take the "hate the sin, not the sinner approach" (or to paraphrase for Tanguerra: "hate the evil, not the evil-doer")? In fact, is hate (as an extreme form of animosity/antipathy) ever justified?


There are perspectives to all of these questions that a multi-lifetime experience brings to the table. So, I'm not disappointed with what's been said so far, but I think there is far more that could be said.


Cordially,


S&S
 
Ah, that's true. I do have memories that are directly linked to several points on my list.


For example: I suspect that I was tortured during one of my lives.


My best friend who is into studying that sort of thing assures me that my phobias (waterwheels and sharp things, in particular) add up to a particular form of torture reserved for witches. I persuaded her not to describe it to me. I was male in that particular life, so I wondered whether men could be considered witches. Apparently the answer is "yes" ... it may be so.


I've not been at all inclined to remember "how I died" in the life that feels most associated with these feelings. I just know that there were assumptions made because I was helping someone heal from an accident that could easily have killed them, and maybe because I was gay, too. The end of that life was "unfair" in the extreme.


Each of the phobias can be dealt with, even without remembering why I have them. Recognizing that they aren't intrinsic to this life is helping me to do this more rationally.


Also, I "hated" my ex husband for the way he treated me until I figured out that attempting to manipulate him into being a nice guy by staying and letting him abuse me was my own responsibility. That was associated to a past life where I was his son and he strangled me when I attempted to stop him from cheating on my mother. It took a few lifetimes to figure out I couldn't make him be faithful or loving, either by rejection or by tolerating his behavior.


Now I really hope he'll treat his next wife better, and that he'll have a good life with her. It's not really my business, either way. I've learned that "hate" can be a desire to control something that isn't mine to control, and that's destructive to me as well as to my relationships.
 
The profile for my twitter account describes me as "an open-minded, interesting person working to rid us of war, banksters and the lying media." And I suppose that's what I hate, and something tells me that in past lives I've had ample reasons to hate all of those things. I do in this life too, but I think I could have been the victim of some nasty smear campaigns in the past. I've always had a problem with authority, too. saywhat
 
I am terrified of hospitals and medical clinics in a way where I don't trust them.I think I carried that from the past.I still think of them as primitive and I get this feeling that they have no idea what they are doing.I had to force myself to have dental surgery because I kept getting this thought that it would somehow kill me.I think old medical technology scared the hell out of me!
 
If anything, I think this thread opens up doors to another indicia of PL influence.


I have heard many stories linking (known) past life fears, loves and abilities to current life predilections. One of the reasons I got this started is because people don't usually speak about what/who they hate because of PLs. I suppose this isn't very "evolved" and we all want to look "spiritual" (however we may define this), but I thought I'd break open the doors in terms of people who had conscious memories of being tortured, burned at the stake, beheaded, and/or etc. and bore a continuing animus against whoever "dunnit". What I found is--still--very few folks willing to say anything in this area.


Maybe this is just because few folks remember PL hates, though I doubt this for reasons I might bring up later. Anyhow, not a lot of what I was looking for, but something else. The idea that unexplained antipathies were a PL indicator just like unexplained abilities, loves and fears might be a PL indicator. This is interesting, if only because it gives us another clue to add to the data we accumulate and perhaps a chance to say "aha" when we find out why we have that unexplained animosity and most especially that unexplained prejudice against someone or something.


However, whether love, hate, fear or ability is at issue, a lot of caution is necessary, especially since there are almost always present life causative factors that could also be in play, including heredity and upbringing. Still, even here, the question of what came first presents an interesting dilemma--e.g., do I love music because I was born into a musical family, or was I born into a musical family because I already loved music?


Cordially,


S&S
 
The past life I remember most vividly - and which has been traumatic for me - is one from the nineteenth century in which I was unhappily married. I was a homosexual male but married to a woman (and not 'practising' my homosexuality) and in the long-term we had lots of arguments and misunderstandings. We both did not fit into the gender roles that society expected of us as well. Everything was quite dreadful actually.


The thing is, I've always hated the institution of marriage and gender roles. It never made any sense because my parents are very happily married and there is not really "a reason" for me to feel so strongly about this. I can become really mad if I even think about marriage and I hate the thought about having to get married myself. I have mixed feelings when I see people "getting happily married" as well. They can do as they please of course, but to be honest I find it quite stupid. Besides, when someone would talk about "women are this way and men this way" I would become very angry. I resent it so much.


When I became older I started reading about gender and queer theory and different styles of doing relationships and I have now rationalised my antipathies and I really believe in it, i.e. I have found rational reasons to feel as I do but the basis was once irrational. I also try to do relationships differently (relationship anarchy).


I'm not sure if you mean this by "hate" because it is not focused on a specific person or group but more on society / cultural ideas.
 
Hi SeaAndSky,


I decided to tell you about my PL ‘hate’, although I still don’t like talking about it. I can’t pinpoint any specific reason for this hate, but it is so strong, I don’t even want to investigate it.


There are two events that I think are connected.


The first one is a PL memory:

I was in a big house, there were many rooms, it was a beautiful house and looked wealthy.
I was very sad, but not crying. I just came out of the room where my daughter was lying, dead. She died in an accident (fell from a horse or so).


It was the day of her funeral. Soon somebody would come to get her to be buried.


While I was standing in the room next to the room where she was in, my husband entered. It was a very tall man, he had black hair and he was strongbuild. He was so much taller than me.


He was dressed in a black suit and a white shirt, but the shirt was not very clean. When I looked at myself, I was dressed in some white dress, but it was not very clean either. I got the feeling we once were wealthy, but now we were rather poor, but wanted to keep up our standard.


My husband put his arm around me and said it was time to go, and he led me to the door.


What I felt about myself was that I was a rather dull person, like I never had ideas of my own or so, I just lived my life as my husband wanted me to live it. This is where the memory ends.
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I always had the feeling this was a lifetime in Austria or Germany.


(continued in next post)
 
(continued)


The second is a dream I had. I don’t remember anymore if the dream came first, or the memory.

The part of the dream that I remember was that I was in an attic, with several other people, all lying on matresses or so, and my childhood doctor came in and said that the place needed to be cleaned.
Next I remember was that I was probably half awake half asleep yet, because I was in my own present day bedroom again, but I sensed some ‘creatures’ or ‘ghosts’. I was not really scared, but I wanted them to leave, so (inside my head) I shouted: Go away, I want you to leave me alone. After repeating that a few times, the entities went away, but one was reluctant, and took hold of a lamp that was in my room and started shuffling it, and I heard it say ‘Maria Weber’.


I knew I was still dreaming because that particular lamp was one that 1) didn’t belong in my bedroom, but had been in my living room for several years. 2) I had given it tot he recycling shop about a year before.
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At that time, we still had a dream section at this forum, so I asked someone for a dream interpretation. The answer I got was: The attic represented the mind/spirit, whatever, that needed to be cleaned up. The lamp represented something old, ( a PL) but also light, something from that PL that I needed to pay attention to.


And then there was Maria Weber. I had no clue who this was. Then it was suggested I looked up Carl Maria von Weber, the composer.


And BAM!!! As soon as I started reading about him on the internet, I got angry. I was mentally shouting: No!! That was not what he was like! He was bad, he was evil, he was responsible for my misery! And more thoughts like that, although no actual memory popped up. But I got more and more disgusted about reading what a kind and talented man he was. I couldn’t read any further, I just didn’t want to know the nice opinion people had about him.


Later it was suggested to me that probably he was the cause of the miserable state I lived in in the PL of which I posted the memory above. Maybe he appeared to me as a ghost in my dream, letting me know by the Light that there was still some unfinished business, and wanted forgiveness and closure.


Well up till now I can’t. I don’t want to hear about him, don’t want to read about him, don’t want to listen to his music. I hate him. I hate him so much that I don’t even care that he needs forgiveness. Leave me alone, Carl Maria von Weber!


I can’t factually explain these feelings, and to be honest, I don’t feel the need. I don’t want to explore this life. For me it is over and done, and I don’t care if he (spiritually) still suffers from whatever wrongs he did. I think he doesn’t need my forgiveness, but needs to forgive himself.


And it may surprise you, but in the present life people see me as a kind and gentle person, I care for others, even most of my working career has been in social service and healthcare. My reaction to Weber is extraordinary, because it is a 360 degree turn from my normal behavior. Fortunately, I almost never think about him, it was just your question that made me remember this again.
 
I despise everything about military. I'm not just a pacifist, no, I would really like to abolish literally everything about military lifestyle. Particularly the very thought of something like military academies or boot camps gives me the creeps.


I had these strong negative feelings since earliest childhood and I never knew why, because there was absolutely no reason for this in my present life. Today I know I had some traumatic PL-experiences with abusing soldier-fathers.
 
Hi Lestat/Nangijala,


Thanks for your respective posts. They have a lot in common, since the thing(s) you both despise have more to do with institutions and cultural forces/beliefs than individuals (even though there may have been PL individuals who were problematic to you and representative of those cultures/institutions in your PLs). In any case, it seems like you are not looking back with loathing on a person so much as on the forces in society and culture that person or persons represented (and that you found hostile and problematic in your PL). So, another interesting addition to the knowledge base in this category. Also, your posts make a very distinctive contrast with the posts by Eevee.


Hi Eeevee,


I think you are the first person to respond with something like I was initially expecting in this thread: real enmity towards a particular PL person. However, this is one of those places where I don't feel like I can or should pry further into your PL and reasons for your enmity to CMvW, given the fact that you don't want to be drug into that at this point. I did spend some time researching CMvW's life and got some very definite ideas about who you might have been, but nothing is sure and that is probably irrelevant to you at this point. I think you are still dealing with this, and are probably farther along in the process than I am in dealing with some PL issues I have. Consequently, I'm not going to delve further, though I am always interested in any further thoughts you may have on the general subject matter of the thread, particularly the issue of how to best deal with lingering PL personal enmities.


Cordially,


S&S
 
Hi SeaAndSky,


I said in my previous post: I don't think he needs my forgiveness, he needs to forgive himself.


And I think that is how I am dealing with it now. For ME the emotional impact is in the past, I don't want to carry it with me in this life. I don't want to dig up all that negative energy and 'work it out'. Not now. Maybe not in this lifetime. As I said, I hardly think about it, it doesn't bother me constantly and has no negative impact on my present life, as far as I know. It was only your question that made me think about it again.


I won't say I never will need to 'make peace with the Soul Weber', I only decided: not now.


From a different perspective, it is my opinion that this attitude I have in this case, is not unhealthy. I would like to compare it with people in our present lives that try to suck our energy, or try to infest us with their negative energy. The methods they use are: trying to make us feel guilty, trying to make us believe we don't care for them, etc. I had several of such people in my environment. It made me feel miserable. Whatever I tried to help them, to be there for them, and more, it never was enough. And if I ever dared to say: No, I can't do that for you, or at least not immediatly, I often got the response: You NEVER have time for me (although for over a 100 times I left my own things to be there for them), its ALWAYS too much if I ask anything from you (OMG) etc., etc.


I was not living MY life anymore, but bending myself to theirs. Till I decided: enough!


I am much happier now, and the funny thing is, although most of those (then annoying) people, kept complaining for a while, but I didn't give in, and now, most of them show a lot more respect for me then they did when I was easier in granting their requests immediatly.


And I think I can compare that with the PL feelings about Weber. It is not my problem anymore. He is out of my life now, and I won't let him back in, not emotionally. If his Soul or Spirit still had not come clear with the past, it was up to him to come to terms with himself, without my help.


But now you made me curious about my PL identity and the connection with Weber. I think I am emotionally strong enough now to hear the facts, if you would like to share your research. Hearing facts is different than going through an emotional PL memory, and it is also different from having to spit through all the information about him that might unexpectly rise emotions again. And it is several years ago that I reacted so emotionally to what I read about Weber, it was just after that dream where I encountered his spirit. It was later on that I decided that I would refuse to get involved in his emotional business again.:cool:


So, I am asking you, what facts did you find out, please?


And now that I think about it, I guess my PL hate for him that I felt in the present when reading about him, has over the years probably changed into an annoyance that he dared bothering me again in the present life.


As Tanguerra said in this thread:

I wouldn't like to think that I carry any old 'hates' with me. There are some bad things that happened, but, hey... that's life.
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Eevee
 
Hi Eevee,


I can't say that I have facts, only suspicions. The two main suspects are Therese Brunetti and Caroline Brandt. Both were singers and both were great loves of CMvW.


Therese was, as the demon Screwtape might have put it--his "infernal Venus"--a married woman, a mother, but amorous and passionate, she drove him mad, but ultimately only tormented him. He finally left her orbit, and found--Caroline Brandt--his "heavenly Venus". Caroline was much younger than Therese. A young and talented singer who lived with her mother and seems to have been very much liked and respected by all. He was able to convince her to marry him, but in marrying her he took her from the stage and a very promising career. (She was seemingly considered by all to be a wonderful person with great possibilities--a rising star). A girl baby died young--I don't think there were any horses involved. Two boys survived, though one died 18 years later. CMvW died young (39 or 40) trying to repair his fortunes with death looming by concertizing in England. He left her with the two children, and not (I suspect) much else.


I didn't really look into what became of either after his death. And, I am writing from memory at the moment--I did not save the various sites that I found. So, there is a possibility that I have gotten some facts wrong (I need to go back and do a fact check). However, based on the foregoing, I think that you were Caroline Brandt. She had cause to resent him for the reasons set forth above (as well as for the other reasons you have stated that didn't make the history books). However, I could not completely discount Therese. She was a passionate woman, who could certainly have held a grudge against him due to his leaving her, and simultaneously might well have held him in contempt.


Those are, once again, only my suspicions. There may be other possibilities that are not immediately obvious, and this is by no means a finished research project.


Cordially,


S&S


PS--You will find an image of Caroline (age uncertain) here, though you will have to wade through images of CMvW to get down to her: http://blog.akg-images.co.uk/mailout/1109/carl-maria-von-weber/index.html


PPS--There is a rather glowing summary of the foregoing in the last chapter of a book about famous loves that is available online. I was able to download a pdf, but don't know how to get it to you (if you wish to read it). Hopefully, you can do the same if you wish to:


https://books.google.com/books/download/Famous_love_matches.pdf?id=IuE8AQAAIAAJ&hl=en&capid=AFLRE71oO03vxXDet29-o52T4lUV9H6Cva6rV3DVeGIjpThfr-86TNs7LyTxS1kUbnwgSkyLtmzLEkwK9b-e4bfB6DH1bFivCw&continue=https://books.google.com/books/download/Famous_love_matches.pdf%3Fid%3DIuE8AQAAIAAJ%26output%3Dpdf%26hl%3Den
 
Eevee,


I'm beginning to think that the two images I've given you are slightly different. The smaller one shows, to my eye, a more slender woman (though the dress and many other features are the same). I mention this because it may make a better image for comparison purposes.


I have to admit here that my first impulse on finding Caroline's image was to try to compare it with the small photo accompanying your posts. For that purpose, I wish that either the Caroline image was frontal like your photo, or your photo was angled like she is in the images linked. However, even with this drawback--and hoping I will not insult you--I think I see definite similarities in the shape of the face. In terms of other features, you both have well proportioned symmetrical features, but it is hard to tell much more than that without better quality images.


What are your thoughts?


Cordially,


S&S
 
Hi SeaAndSky,


Thank you for your research. I looked at Caroline Brandt's picture and indeed, there is a resemblance. Especially the mouth. And the picture has a lot of resemblance with old pictures I have seen of (deceased) family members of mine, on the mothers side (and it is said I resemble my mother).


I was also able to find the book you mentioned at the Internet Archive, and read the last chapter.


But I am not convinced I was Weber's wife. In my memory I had a look at my husband, and he was much taller and stronger built. He looked more like Bach. (Don't mind the article, it is this picture that resembles most my memory). But I know I wasn't Bach's wife, he had too many children, I know I had not.


I also have the strong feeling that Weber was responsible for the financial and social ruin of my family. No feelings of a friendship or a close relation, but something business-like.


You know, I read the chapter in this book with completely different emotions than when I read about him before. More cynical instead of angry: 'Again they write about HIS misery, how he was fragile and lame, and wasn't paid enough, and dissappointed in love etc.' But nobody knows, or wants to make public the misery he put others through!


Are you interested in researching more? As I mentioned before, I am not emotionally neutral while spitting through the information about Weber.


Thank you for your interest!


Eevee
 
Hi Eevee,


You immediately put your finger on one of the major discrepancies in terms of Brandt: The description of CMvW does not fit the large man in your PL memory. However, Brandt was also supposed to be diminutive, so I thought CMvW (a fairly small man) might have seemed large to Brandt. Likewise, the Brandt/CMvW daughter who died does not quite fit the description of the PL daughter who had died. Finally, there is a definite contrast between the two "suspects" named and your own description of yourself as a person:


"What I felt about myself was that I was a rather dull person, like I never had ideas of my own or so, I just lived my life as my husband wanted me to live it."


This would certainly not have fit the wilful Brunetti. It might have fit a very settled Brandt, I suppose, but she also seemed to be a woman with more verve and individuality than this thought expresses.


Cordially,


S&S


PS--I will continue to look. Projects of this type fascinate me.


PPS--I was interested in your response to the Brandt image. The resemblance to my mother's family was also one of the things that struck me in looking at a photo of my putative PL self. She also definitely looked like what I might have looked like (starting out from earliest childhood photos) and growing up female rather than male--definitely close enough to be a twin sister. However, what "nailed" me were the eyes. She was looking out at me through my own eyes--or so it seemed to me. That is one of the things that strikes me about your response--no mention of the eyes--which often seem to be key to the "recognition" process.
 
Eevee,


Another thought. Unless you were a relative, I do not believe you would have had much first hand experience with CMvW. We will probably need to look for male associates who were ruined by their association with him.


From your own description, you seem to have fit into the stay-at-home housewife and mother category in this PL. Consequently, unless this has something to do with the finances of Weber's extended family or a family legacy, it would have been your PL husband who would have been making the business arrangements and would have a name that might show up in the history books as a business or artistic associate of Weber.


Do you have any "feelings" or sense of who your PL husband might have been, whether your husband had a business relationship of some kind with CMvW, or whether you or he had any family relationship with Weber? I'm going to see if I can find out who might have been ruined by their association with Weber, but hints would be helpful.


Cordially,


S&S
 
SeaAndSky,


I have a strong feeling that indeed my husband had some business relation with Weber, something that caused us great financial losses. And as a housewife, it seems most probable my husband didn't really discuss his business with me.


Another feeling I had: My daughter was dead, and I regretted we were not able to give her more, because I felt she deserved a better (wealthier) life.


The house we lived in was a mansion, with a portico and rounded stairs outside, and a driveway that went round a fountain or a big round bed of flowers. Then there was a--not very long--lane to the street. The outside of the house was mostly white (but needed plastering/painting).


It once was a costly mansion, and still looked so at first sight, but if you looked more closely, you could see it needed much repairs and cleaning. I guess we couldn't pay for that anymore, and probably had only a few or maybe only one servant...


We were expecting a carriage with a horse or horses to bring my daughter to the funeral (church probably).


The memory was not long, but many detailed emotional impressions accompanied it.


That is all I can come up with right now.
 
Need to Vent


Being reincarnated with "Really Mean, Evil People" who I NEVER wanted to be with in the first place, but they seem to reappear quite often in my lives.


I realize I'm expected to work with these people and soften them up, but I'm just too tired anymore to be a teacher to them, you would think that their Spirit Guide's would step up to the plate and teach them some good manners between lives.


Maybe I'm way off base (maybe I am) but I just need to VENT, why can't everyone just get along and be nice to each other, is that TOO much to ask???


Thank you for putting up with me.
 
I may be wrong but I see these times as a real test of what we believe in. Something like believers turning to their God for help and guidance. I'm well and truly passed physical issues in the physical world upsetting me. That allows me to act and speak freely about what I believe in. It also allows me to allow others to choose their own course in the physical and spiritual without any real need to wish or hope they were any different to what they are and what they will turn out to be. I'm not a saviour of people neither are you, and I don't want to be one, maybe you do. I know and understand what and who I am spiritually , that's all that matters .. not only to me but to all of us
 
Getting caught ... even if I know full well there is no guilt involved.. This feeling is entertwined with this life's experiences and past lives .. Rather interesting just reflecting on it now... Always good to see how these feelings connect to past experiences..


.
 
My uncle in this life killed me in my past life. He shot me over a financial dispute.


He was my wife's brother in that life - my mother's brother in this one. (It's funny, because my wife in that life reincarnated into my mother in this one. She can verify this... It's interesting how souls like to stick together.) He was an alcoholic gambler, and he wanted to borrow some money, and I wasn't too fond of giving up any to his bad habits.


In this life, I can't stand him. He wronged us again, in many ways, and I feel very strongly that it is the same man. Just seeing him makes me angry. I wish I could resolve it. I probably would have given him a second chance if he didn't do what he did in this life.


(I hope this is clear.)
 
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